


And My Daughter, Though a Genius, Is a Freak

by foundbyjohndoe



Category: Next to Normal - Kitt/Yorkey
Genre: F/M, This isnt my best work, Trans Female Character, Transphobia, and the second half is being written during a depressive episode, i only write about natalie lol, i wrote the first half of this on a bus, it's not that bad but please be aware it's there, yeehaw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2020-12-28 15:21:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21138860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foundbyjohndoe/pseuds/foundbyjohndoe
Summary: Heather, when asked to give me a prompt : family is transphobic, runs away to boifweind, but boifweind isn’t nice she has no where else to go.me : oh thats sad i fucking hate that i'm changing it. thanks anyway





	1. it's times like these I wonder how I take it

“Mom,” Nat’s knuckles whitened as she clutched her knees, “eyes on the road, eyes on the road!” 

Her mother continued her 72 miles per hour death stare at Nat, the intensity in her gaze making Nat’s thumbs curl tighter into the side of where calf met thigh. 

These weren’t the eyes of someone safe. Nat no longer wanted to be riding shotgun. She didn’t want to be anywhere near her mother.

“Say you don’t mean it,” Nat’s mother whispered as a Prius swerved to avoid them, “Say you were joking.” 

Nat’s mouth opened, but no words came out. 

“Say it!” Her mother’s voice screeched, making Nat jump backwards in her seat, hitting the window. 

“Say it, Nathan, say it!” 

“No! Please, no, I can’t! Can you look at the road?!” 

The woman slammed on the break, stopping in the middle lane of the freeway. She stared, unblinking, at Nat. 

“No?”

“No!”

They both started at each other. Nat shifted so she could raise her legs as protection if need be. 

“Mom, can we please-...I’m sorry I upset you. Can we please go to my recital now?” 

“Nathan. Say you were joking. Tell me you were lying.” 

Nat stayed silent, staring at a cup holder full of change. 

“Nathan.”

…

“Nathan you are not a girl. Say it.”

…

“You’re my little boy. You’re my perfect plan.”

…

“Say it.”

“Stop it, mom. We don’t have to talk about it anymore. Let’s go.” 

Her mother grabbed her wrist, pulling her close. 

“Say you didn’t mean it, sweetie. I understand it was a joke. You just have to admit it.” 

It would be easy to admit it. 

No it wouldn’t.

It would hurt so bad.

Nat met her mother’s eyes. Tears were falling free from them.

“I’m sorry mom.” 

The woman’s face contorted.

“No! This isn’t funny! You’re my son!” 

Nat snatched her hand away.

“You don't have a son!” 

“No! No, you don't get to say that-”

Nat began to scream to be heard over her mother. 

“I get to talk! I get to speak, mom, I do!”

“Stop! Stop it- shut up! Shut up Nathan! Say it was a joke! Say you’re my son!”

“You don't have a son! He’s dead! Your son is dead!”

Her mother’s mouth snapped shut. Then she reached over and clicked open Nat’s seatbelt. 

“Out.”

…

“Get out.” 

Nat didn’t even shut the door behind her before the car drove off.

* * *

It took about half an hour to follow the road signs to the rest stop. It looked like every Wawa, Duane Read, and Seven Eleven combined into one. Good enough. 

Nat pushed open the door and sidestepped so it could swing back into place behind her. There was a short man near the soda fridges, and an older woman behind the counter. Nat approached her.

“Do you have a like- a payphone here?” She asked.

The woman smiled vaguely in her direction. “Nothing that works.”

Nat felt like walking out into traffic. 

“Hey… honey… eyes up, honey.”

The woman was extending her cell phone, already opened to the calling app, to Nat, still smiling in that strange way. The girl took the phone, and stepped back to dial her father.

He picked up immediately.

“Dad, it’s Nathan, I-”

“You’re supposed to be at a piano recital. Where is your mother?” 

Nat stayed silent, which was an answer of sorts. Her father seemed to understand it, anyway.

“Where are you?”

Nat looked around to the woman who quirked her eyebrow. ‘Where is this?’ Nat mouthed. The woman gestured for the phone, and Nat handed it off.

The woman turned her back to her and said something with a lot of numbers and names of highways into the phone. Nat started to feet dizzy. She had no fucking clue where this was.

The phone was in her hands again. 

“Nathan? Nathan?” Her father’s voice was saying, “Nathan I’m going to find your mother, then I’ll pick you up, okay? Stay where you are. The owner is going to watch you for me. Okay?”

Nat drew in a breath. “Okay.”

Dial tone. She walked over to the checkout counter and set the phone face down. The woman’s hand covered hers over the counter, and a gentle squeeze made all the dizziness rush back. A sort of crushed exhale came from Nat’s mouth aa she tipped slightly foreward. 

“Come sit down honey,” the woman said, “sit while you wait.”

Nat nodded shakily and held onto an edge as she made her way around the counter.


	2. and if other daughters feel the way I do

There was a boy behind the counter. 

Nat’s legs almost tangled themselves in his earbud wires as she stepped between the counter walls. She did a quick sidestep to avoid him and hugged the wall. He barely blinked to acknowledge her. 

The cashier snapped her fingers in his face. 

“Henry,” she said, “Henry!”

Henry took a single earbud out and tilted his chin towards her. “Yeah mom?”

“Nathan, this is Henry, my son. Henry, this is Nathan. He’s waiting for his dad. Can you talk with him while I deal with customers?” 

…

“Henry. Is it within your skill set to interact with this boy like a normal human be-”

Nat’s throat involuntarily bubbled out a choked sob. The cashier stopped mid sentence, turning to Nat in soft horror. 

“Are you … are you okay, honey?”

Nat shook her head yes as tears began to fall.

No. No, this was awful. She was fine. She had gone through worse. Crying was weak. Crying meant she had let her mother hurt her. Crying meant her mother seeing, and spiraling. 

Nat’s mother didn’t mean it. She knew she didn’t mean it. But oh god, it hurt. And she could never blame her, because oh! Oh no, everything is hard for Diana Goodman! So it’s Nat’s job as a good son to make everything easy for her mother!

“Hey…” 

Nat looked down. Henry’s arm was extended, an earbud dangling from his hand. He made a ‘down’ motion, and Nat slid on her back till she was sitting on the floor. 

Henry passed her the earbud and a made eye contact with his mother. A silent message passed between them as Nat held the earbud to the side of her temple. The sound was turned up loud enough that she could hear it. Some guy’s tinny scream-singing blared as she tilted her head just enough for a tear to slide sideways across her nose. 

Henry gave Nat a grimacing smile and held out his iPod in her general direction. She glanced at the names of unknown artists and songs blankly before flicking her tear heavy eyes back up to him. 

Henry, inexplicably, got the message. 

“You really don’t recognize any of this?”. He sounded scandalized.

Nat shrugged.

Henry scooted closer to turn the screen back to Nat and scroll down.

“Any of this? How about Paramore? No? Okay … okay wait- you’ve gotta know- no?! Not even Green Day? What’s your style … like … what do you listen to? Is it more … j-pop? Lesley Gore? Nightcore? Gorillaz? Cyberpunk? Stuff from the 50s?”

Nat’s tears had begun to dry. She even found his insistence on finding a song she recognized a bit entertaining. Silently, she decided that even if he did have a song she recognized, she wouldn’t tell him so he’d keep talking. 

“-Panic? Taylor Swift? Uhh … what’s it called … Vocaloid? My Chem? C’mon, give me something to work with here.”

Nat exhaled hard through her nose, and a faint smile made its way to the corners of her mouth.

“Mozart.” She said, almost inaudible. 

“Mozart?” Henry repeated, “Oh fucking hell, the one thing I wouldn’t have.”

“Language.” The cashier said. Henry made a face. Nat laughed. The store door opened.

Nat’s father walked in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just got out of a depressive episode. Really feeling like I need a Henry. Happy Halloween.


End file.
